I Love You One Hundred Times IIMaybeII
by Sandkopf
Summary: It's the beginning of the Hundred Theme Challende Variation Two but I'm not sure if I will continue it. As long as the Maybe is in the title it could just stay a few One-Shots. Would be great to know what you think. Malec.
1. 01 Introduction

Bane.

That was all.

Alec Lightwood only knew from the man he dated that his name was Magnus Bane, that he was a warlock and his parent's circumstances causing him to be raised by the Silent Brothers.

He stood in front of the front door to Magnus's apartment examining the buzzer with the warlocks name written on it. Alec had sneaked out of the Institute not having prepared a good excuse yet, and was ready to spend the next hours with the High-Warlock of Brooklyn.

They hadn't really planned something for tonight, Magnus had only asked Alec over and he had agreed.

And now he was standing here, wondering what exactly he found so captivating about Magnus Bane.

Of course, his appearance was more than extraordinary. His spiky and glittering hair making him look even taller, his clothes a mess of every color one can think of and his glowing cat-eyes seem to look right into the heart.

Then there was his very interesting character. The mixture of sarcasm, coolness and sweetness fascinated the Shadowhunter in a way he could have never imagined.

Alec wanted to be near this person for he never met someone like Magnus an moreover, never was he ever so interested in a person and never was a person that interested in Alec.

When he was finally ready to let the bell ring, the speaker crackled and Magnus's voice appeared "How long do you plan to inspect my door? I'm so much more interesting to look at. And prettier."

The door sprang open. Wondering how long he had actually stood there, Alec paced up the stairs, his boots making muffled sounds. In the door frame of Magnus's front door stood the warlock already. Alec looked up, seeing with surprise that Magnus's hair laid down around his face, curling very lightly and for a chance, didn't glitter. He wore a dark red T-shirt with an "M" written in white on it and dark jeans, like Alec's. He looked unfamiliar normal, yet, very good.

"Come in, then." he smirked vanishing in his flat. Following, Alec closed the door behind him.

"You know you're actually the only person doing that." Magnus called from the couch winking the Shadowhunter over.

"Closing the door?" Alec asked confused. He pulled his boots of, cursing silently to himself. Why can't he respond something intelligent? Why was that so hard?

When he sat down on the couch Magnus's arm was immediately around him and he got a kind greeting kiss.

There was it again. As their lips touched everything in Alec felt light and while closing his eyes he relaxed into the kiss, his hand raised to cup Magnus's cheek. When Magnus kissed him nothing mattered, not what he might use as an excuse, not what all the others might think, not that he's a Shadowhunter and Magnus a warlock.

When Magnus let go, he locked his eyes with Alec's, studying them.

Suddenly Alec tensed.

"What is it?" Magnus asked surprised, blinking his eyes.

In Alec's head whispered a curse. He sometimes wished not having such an obvious body language. How was that man always so talented in reading him so good? As a Shadowhunter he should be able to control his body but he just always failed around the warlock. Damn it, Damn it, Damn it!

"Something's wrong?" Magnus purred raising one eyebrow.

"It's..." Alec considered saying 'It's nothing.' but knew Magnus wouldn't stop asking and wouldn't let it go until he told him the truth. But Alec didn't know how to express his feelings. Worse, he didn't even exactly know what his feelings actually meant. Most of the time he spent with Magnus was just wonderful, he sometimes even believed he never had a better time but then he started worrying, doubting and fretting. Was it right doing this? Was is right kissing a male warlock? Was it right nobody (except Isabelle) knew about them? Or are all these worries just ridiculous and exaggerated? How can something that feels so right be probably wrong?

Trying to overplay all his thoughts he bend forward to kiss Magnus again. Slowly, he pushed the warlock down on the couch laying on top of him. From Magnus's mouth escaped a soft sound of pleasure encouraging Alec to deepen the kiss. Parting his lips, he pushed his tongue against Magnus's teeth, asking for entrance, while Magnus's hand tangled in Alec's black hair. However, when the Shadowhunter was about to position himself in a more comfortable way on Magnus, the warlock pulled back from Alec's lips.

Unsure, Alec's eyebrows frowned. Nervousness raised in him and made him try to figure what could have went wrong. The green-golden eyes pierced into the blue ones. Alec was about to ask what was wrong but then Magnus spoke. "I really do enjoy kissing you but apparently you do not."

"No!" Alec said straightening up, Magnus's hand falling from his head. "I mean..."

Magnus sat up as well so that the two of them sat in front of each other on the couch, Alec with a reddening face and Magnus with a serious expression.

"You know, kissing someone who just overplays his feelings is not really what I understand as a good kiss. Don't get me wrong, I do like you and I want..."

"I don't know anything about you." Alec interrupted.

Magnus's eyebrows shot up. Obviously, he hadn't expected such a statement.

The thoughts and feelings rode rollercoaster in Alec.

Had he really just said that? But it was true, wasn't it? He had the right to know maybe not everything but at least something about the man he secretly dated.

An awkward silence rose between them. Alec looked unsure but straight at the warlock who responded the eye contact with a look of high curiosity. Why did he look curious? Shouldn't it be Alec to have this look on his face? What game was he playing with him?

"What do you want to know?" asked Magnus simply.

"Ehh..." made Alec. Damn it! How stupid he sounded again. "I don't know." he admitted. After all, this was the truth. He really didn't know what exactly he wanted to know, just that he wanted to know something. Something that made him feel more comfortable.

"Just something." Alec muttered. "Something about you. I can't explain why or what. It's just that I feel weird around you, making out with someone I do not know anything about."

"You're right. You might call it weird." Magnus answered. "But what do I know about you?"

Surprise washed through Alec. And realization.

Of course. Magnus probably knew as much from Alec as he knew about the warlock.

"Well," Alec began "I'm a Shadowhunter, soon 18 years old, I live in Manhatten in the Insti..." he was interrupted by a mocking chuckle.

"Your introducing yourself like you want to have a job as a waiter. Or a blind date."

Great Alec, you did it, again.

"I like that."

"What?"

"You being blunt.

"I don't want to know what you like about me." Ok, Alec, that was a lie but wasn't the point right now "I want to know the person Magnus Bane."

Grinning brightly, Magnus's eyes lit up. He was just so beautiful. Stay concentrated, Alec.

"Then you could be of some help and ask me something." Alec murmured grumpily.

"Let's do it like this." Magnus began, shifting on the couch. "I ask you something and you ask me something."

"Alright." but in the moment Alec agreed he wondered if it was the best idea. He could just hope Magnus wouldn't ask things below the belt.

"Your favourite way to drink coffee."

Inwardly, Alec breathed a sigh of relief. That was easy.

"I drink it black. Sometimes with milk."

"Thought so. Your turn." Magnus said smiling.

Slowly, Alec opened his mouth to ask him the same for he didn't really had an idea but closed it again. Looking at Magnus, he thought that he already knew the answer: he didn't had a special type. Essential was just some white chocolate or cream in every flavour possible. Therefore, Alec searched for an other question.

"What's your favourite piece of clothes?"

"A special one? Would be impossible to answer this. I never wear anything twice."

"You're kidding!" Alec looked at the warlock with wide eyes. Not even Isabelle had such a lifestyle. What a waste!

"You can check out my wardrobe if you like. You won't find anything in there I had already worn. Or do you remember me wearing something twice?"

Alec swallowed. He didn't. To be honest, he already recognized always new clothes on Magnus. Where Alec always wears the same dark jeans and the same dark sweaters, Magnus always showed himself in the most spectacular outfits, every day another one.

"Your turn." Alec said.

"What is your favourite weapon?"

For a short moment, the Shadowhunter thought about it. "I like my bow and my featherstaff. But I prefer the bow and arrows 'cause it's easier to keep Izzy's and Jace's back free with it."

Magnus responded with a wide grin and the wiggle of his eyebrows told Alec it was his turn again.

"Which season do you like most?"

"I do believe they have all their advantages. But I think I like winter most. It's not ridiculously hot outside and the whole town is blinking and colorful and I love snow." the warlock explained getting a weird look from the man in front of him. "I hate winter." Alec said.

Chuckling softly, Magnus asked his next question. "What's your favourite color?"

Alec frowned. "Isn't that kind of obvious?"

"It truly is." the tall warlock leaned over to Alec running his hand over the sweater down the Shadowhunter's chest. "So why did a ask you?" he purred in Alec's ear, his hot breath prickling at Alec's skin sending goosebumps through him. Opening his mouth, Alec stayed concentrated forming an answer in his head which he, however, couldn't say aloud.

"Don't know." he whispered instead as he felt Magnus's lips behind his ear.

"Because" leaning back to watch into the blue eyes Magnus went on "I already knew that. And I know you like your coffee black with a bit milk sometimes. I know that you like to shot arrows instead of using your blades. And I know you prefer dark colors. Don't tell me you didn't know the answers to your questions."

Surprise filled Alec. He was right. He did knew every answer.

"And I bet you even know the answers if you had asked me the questions I asked you."

The Shadowhunter nodded. "You don't have a favourite way to drink coffee. You just throw every flavour near you in it. You fight with you spells, I never saw a useful weapon in here. And your favourite color... wait I don't know that one."

"It's the blue of your eyes." Magnus said, leaning forward to catch Alec's lips with his own. Making a sound of pleasure, Alec thought he maybe did knew more about the man he secretly dated. More than he had thought.

Hungrily, Alec tangled his hand in Magnus's hair pulling him down on him.

The kiss felt great.


	2. 02 Love

The sight of his boyfriend made Magnus's heart itch.

Alec was sitting on the pink couch in Magnus's flat, his mouth set in a straight line, his eyes half-closed looking down on his feet. His hands were nervously folded in his lap when Magnus walked over to him, putting the cup of tea on the couch table.

Thoughtfully, he let his cat eyes wander from Alec's sad face over his tensed shoulders down to Alec's feet clothed in holey black socks. The warlock was an expert when it came to reading Alec's body language but even without this particular knowledge was is clear that he had a fight with his parents. Again.

Putting his own hand over Alec's, he could feel how cold they were. Though, this didn't surprise Magnus for his boyfriend always had a lower body temperature than Magnus whose body heat was normally high enough to warm them both. He entwined his ringed fingers with Alec pale ones and pulled them softly toward him forcing Alec to turn a bit in Magnus's direction. Without a word he locked his cat eyes on Alec who still didn't raised his head but Magnus was patient. In over eight hundred year of his life he had learned to be patient and he knew he had to use this skill around Alec because Alec needed his time to say difficult things. He needed his time to admit things and Magnus had this time. He would always have the time, especially for Alec.

Gently, he stroked Alec's hands with his thumb, his skin scarred from work and training. These scars were Alec's rings, like they were for every Shadowhunter. Their scars were their jewelry, their story, their pride.

A heavy silence laid over them. The weight on Alec's shoulders had returned, the weight pushing him down avoiding him to be the person he is, the weight he had finally thrown away when he kissed Magnus in the Accord Hall. Magnus had been so glad when Alec came out, when he had admitted he was in love with a male warlock. So glad that the only thing he wanted was to keep this happiness and show all the world how happy they were together. And it had been a long time since Magnus felt such joy.

Yet, his parents had put down a weight on Alec's shoulders again by not accepting their relationship. Magnus hated to see Alec like this, the more angry he got with Maryse and Robert for rejecting their son.

Despite all his patience, Magnus's anger needed to break the silence, needed to show his boyfriend that he was their for him, that he wanted to solve the problem together.

"Tell me." he said simply. "Tell me what happened."

Finally, Alec showed some sort of reaction. His hand tightened around Magnus's, his eyes raised to meet Magnus's but they were still sad. The blue was deep and Magnus could see that on the ground of them the love which originally laid there was replaced by guilt, confusion and depression.

Slowly, Alec opened his mouth. "I don't understand it."

They kept their eye contact, their hands still hold on tight and the warlock only wanted to pull his boyfriend close and hug him showing him he was safe here, showing him nothing else mattered because they were together and nothing could rip them apart. But Magnus mustn't interrupt Alec now because it would lead to become a never-to-talk-about topic making Alec try to handle it on his own until he would miserably fail and become even more depressed.

So he held himself back only shifting a bit on the couch to sit nearer by Alec's side.

"They tell me I am wrong. They keep telling me that this relationship is only temporarily. They can't understand that I am honestly in love with you and they don't believe you have the same feelings for me." Alec's voice was shaking and fighting for control. He closed his eyes now, inhaling deeply.

"But you do, right?" opening his eyes again the blue shone with such helplessness and hope it made Magnus startle. Never had he known a person who had so strong eyes in which every single emotion was so clearly readable.

"Of course I do." he whispered softly, moving his hand to cup Alec's left cheek. In response, the Shadowhunter leaned into the touch keeping the eye contact.

"I love you, Alec. You are very important to me and I could never stand to lose you." Magnus broke of thinking if he really should tell Alec what he wanted to say. How much Alec had changed him. How much Alec meant to him. How much he loved Alec. Although Magnus had difficulties with filling all these emotions in meaningful sentences he knew Alec had to hear them. Alec deserved to know them like no other person ever had deserved them before. Besides, the man was looking at him in such an innocent way it made Magnus weak and wanting to do everything for him, even if it meant to go to a deeper place inside Magnus, a place he didn't show a lot of people and definitively not people he had known for roughly a few month. But from the beginning was Alec something special. He had made Magnus fall in love where Magnus never wanted to get in touch with Shadowhunter business again and now he was in the center of it. Alec was different, and that is what made him so irreplaceable for Magnus.

When Magnus was about tell Alec all of this, the Shadowunter started so speak again, his voice fast and full of a lack of comprehension.

"Then why can't they see it? Why can't they just be happy for me just like Izzy and Jace? They told me they were glad I eventually came out and especially Izzy told me how you look at me. You look like someone who had finally found what he was searching for for so long. Everyone keeps telling me we fit perfectly together. Clary, and even Simon whom I've barely talked to. Why are my parents, of all the people in the world, the only ones who can't accept it? I love you so much that I just want to spent every minute with you but it's hard for me to enjoy this time when I know my parents don't...don't..." helplessly, he was searching for the right word, but Magnus stopped him with his index finger on Alec's lips.

"I know." he said softly.

"I'm just so unstable." Alec admitted in a low voice putting his own hand over Magnus which stayed all the time at Alec's cheek.

"We've got to change that." the warlock's voice was firm, making Alec's face fill with surprise.

"How?" he seemed to get desperate now, not understanding what Magnus was intending.

"Firstly, I'll tell you something." now was the time to let Alec see what he really felt.

"Alec, have I ever told you about the danger of immortality?" Alec showed even more surprise, clearly not able to draw any sense of this. Lightly, he shook his head but Magnus could see another feeling awaking in Alec: fear. Alec hated to think about leaving Magnus alone in a couple of decades, becoming a faint memory while Magnus will live on, fall in love again and eventually won't be able to remember the Shadowhunter with the blue eyes whom he had once loved. Magnus could see all of this in Alec's eyes and now the man was afraid Magnus will talk about this very issue. But he didn't intend to. Not at all.

"The danger all vampires and warlocks have to fight against is loosing their feelings." his tone was somber and Alec's expression changed.

Over the years, the immortal get used to a lot and at some point we think some things aren't worth it. Why getting angry at someone who you will never see again because he will die in no matter of time? Why getting excited about something you will soon loose interest in because the world changes all the time?

Not long ago I was very cynical and didn't want to get involved in serious business of others. I just lived here, helping clients with their minor problems and threw parties just to have something to do." he made a little pause before going on. Alec had his grip tightened around Magnus's hand on Alec's face, watching him with still sad, yet, curious eyes.

"I was once friends with the Shadowhunter's in London, around onehundredthirty years ago. They were very nice people, very vivid and had similar issues you have nowadays. Their power was endangered, they had love problems and conflicts between different families. I helped them and they helped me. But time went by and one after another died, one earlier, on later. However, in the end they were all gone. And it made me sad. Because I thought I was used to death and I thought I'd be wise enough not to let them get so near to me that I'd mourn over them.

That's when I moved on. I came to New York, became High Warlock of Brooklyn and just lived. Without any spectacular events.

Then, one day when I threw a party the bell rang and when I opened it, four Shadowhunters and one mundane stood in my door, asking for my help. You know what I'm talking about. It was the first time I saw you, really saw you. For a short moment you took my breath away with your black hair and these startling blue eyes. That's when I felt you gonna be important to me. I just didn't know how." while he spoke he cupped Alec's face with his other hand as well, softly stroking his cheeks.

"I want to be honest with you. That night I swore to myself never ever to get close to the Nephilim again. I didn't want to get a part of your trouble. But something, I can't explain what, something drew me closer to you, Alec. It wasn't only your look, it was deeper than that. It was something I can't even explain right now. I just know it's there.

I got excited again, looking forward to meet you again, I got angry at you when you acted like a stupid blind fly caught in a spider's web.

You, Alexander, made me truly feel again.

That's the one thing why I am in love with you. You must be something special when you have the power to revive an old cynical warlock.

The other thing is the part that draws me closer to you which I can't explain. It's there, and it effects me and what else could something be, that effects you without knowing what it is exactly, if not love?

I love you. And I always will. I'll stand beside you. I'll solve all your problems with you because I want you to be happy just like you made me happy. You should know that in your unstable world right know, there is someone who will surely stand by your side. Me."

Alec put both hands over Magnus's, his eyes widened and he looked like he would start to cry every minute. At this sight, Magnus's mouth curled up in a small smile, small but very lovely and it made Alec lean forward to touch Magnus's lips with his own. The kiss was very soft and slow, and Magnus could feel how Alec's lips were trembling. The Shadowhunter broke the contact and rested his forehead against his boyfriend's. Swallowing, he moved his hand to Magnus's neck.

"I love you." he said under his breath which tickled hotly against Magnus's face.

"I love you, too." Magnus replied. "We will figure something out, okay? I can come with to talk with your parents. Maybe they'll listen to both of us. Maybe I can show them how much I love you. That I truly love you. We should try making them understand. Alright?"

Alec nodded.

"Thank you." he whispered as he pulled Magnus close again to press their lips together, Magnus tangling his arms around Alec to grip him firmly but tenderly.

He wouldn't allow anyone to hurt his Alec. He will keep him safe in his arms and swear by everything he can swear to that he will make this boy happy for he truly loved him.


	3. 03 Light

"It's beautiful!" Alec exclaimed, when he and Magnus stepped up the stairs from the subway to Stephansplatz. Alec's eyes widened by the sight of Stephansdom, standing in it's full pride on the square. He had to tilt his head back to examine it as a whole. Excited, he let his eyes move from stone to stone, fascinating by the old building looking not as old as it really was. The shades of brown were mostly very light but sometimes the stones got darker, scarred by rain, snow and sun over the years. In front of the main entrance, tourist groups were listening to their guide or were making photos from every angle possible. While Alec couldn't stop looking at the dome, Magnus was more satisfied by watching his boyfriend who was as joyful as the warlock had never seen him in New York.

_The distance to his family really is good for him._ Magnus thought happily. Alec had gotten a bit tense when Magnus had invited him to the trip out of the blue but as soon as they had arrived in Giza, he lightened up and seemed to enjoy every minute with Magnus and Magnus alone.

"Let's go inside." Alec said enthusiastically, grabbing the warlock's hand and pulling him through the tourist crowds into the dome.

Gladly, Magnus squeezed his hand in response. _He would have never done this somewhere else in public._

Sometimes Magnus thought it would be easy to travel around the world and never come back to New York. They could live like nomads and simply live their life. However, Magnus knew that was wishful thinking and would never happen. Alec loved his family too much. Moreover, there was this stupid parabatai connection. So he enjoyed the time with Alec here hoping they will keep their extraordinary happiness when they go back.

Inside Stephansdom the Shadowhunter's eyes widened even more. Pulling Magnus after him, he went trough the dome examining every single colorful window and every statue as if it would be the last thing he will ever see in his life.

Without him noticing, Magnus lifted his camera out of his pocket and shot a picture, capturing the adorableness he called his boyfriend.

"Do you even know how sweet you look?" Magnus suddenly insisted while Alec was reading an inscription on the wall. He didn't even realized that Magnus took a picture.

"What?" caught out of his reverie, the man turned to face his boyfriend who was looking at him with a wide grin, camera still in hand. As Alec caught knowledge of the device he opened his mouth to -as Magnus assumed- reply something pouty, when the taller man just put the camera back in his dark jeans pocket and began to speak.

"Nothing, sweetheart. Are you done here or do you still want to try avoiding shopping with me."

At that, Alec's face color turned into a light red. "How about we visit Kapuzinergruft or Narrenturm? Those sound very interesting as well and..." Alec started to convince his boyfriend not to go shopping but do sightseeing instead but he didn't earn any success.

"We've got still time for that tomorrow. You agreed to shopping before going to opera and I promised you to visit everything you want in the next days."

They stared each other for a moment in the eyes, then Alec gave in with a sigh. "Alright."

Grinning, Magnus lead Alec out of the dome.

"By the Angel." Alec sighed while letting himself down on the huge bed in their hotel.

"That was pretty lucrative." Magnus said pleased. He had gotten a lot of new clothes, including a pair of red leather boots, which almost cover his knees and a feather boa fitting the boots. Very satisfied, he put his several bags on the ground beside the bed.

"Why did we had to go in every shop twice?" Alec asked incredulously, propping himself up on his elbows.

"I believe someone as unfashioned as you wouldn't understand that. No offense, darling." Magnus answered. He kicked his boots off and sat on the bed beside Alec.

"But we found something nice for you, too. I'm glad you let me pick it."

Sitting straight up, Alec responded "Yeah, well, I'm surprised it actually suits me."

"Sadly, you haven't agreed to the tie."

"Magnus, please never speak about that tie again, will you?"

The warlock break into a loud laugh, laying back against the mattress. "Be glad I offered you a tie. I could have choosen a boa for you, too."

"I would have given it to Izzy."

"Ah, that's how you treat my presents, I see. Giving them away to you siblings." Magnus commented, rolling to his side and propping his head up in one hand to get a look at the beauty beside him. Alec had closed his eyes, therefore his feature looked relaxed, even after having such an exhausting shopping tour. Magnus was impressed first, when he realized in Giza how long Alec could run around town without pausing, climbing hundreds of stairs an keeping his breath at a normal pace where Magnus started complaining that they could have easily used the lift. Then, one very special night, where Magnus was reminded what great stamina his boyfriend had, Alec showed him a Rune, a beautiful black curving on his back supposed to give him much more stamina than a mundane will ever have. The warlock is still turned on by the thought.

"You're staring." Alec remarked without opening his eyes.

"The last time I worshiped your beauty with words you pinched me."

Alec just smiled at that.

"But I could tell you instead how I think the boa would suit you." tracing a long, ringed finger over Alec's torso, the boy opened his blue orbs to lock them with Magnus's gold-green ones. Smirking, he laid still, even when Magnus could tell it needed him much self-control to resist not giving in into the touch completely. "I don't think so." he finally said and before Magnus could say the smutty comment lying on his tongue, Alec added "But you surely have something. I believe you're wardrobe is bigger than our weapons room."

"Possible but I just bought my outfit for the boa." Magnus finger was still circling on Alec's chest. There was a pause now, in which Magnus could literally see Alec thinking. Bemused, he smiled at him, when Alec suddenly straightened up, his face showing clear signs of shock.

"You're not going to wear the boa tonight!"

"Why not? It suits my boots."

"By the Angel, you're not wearing the boots tonight!"

Magnus pouted. "That's why I went shopping."

"Please. We're going to opera. I'm sure they won't let you in when you're dressed like a burlesque dancer."

The pout got more pouty.

"Don't look at me like that." Alec warned, settling himself suddenly on Magnus's lap.

Smirking, Magnus raised one eyebrow but before he could say something Alec started.

"I think I deserve a make up for the shopping tour."

"I think I deserve a make up for ruining my outfit."

"Let's agree on making up for each other.

"Sounds fair."and with that Alec's lips were on Magnus's.

Within the kiss, Alec pushed Magnus down on his back while Magnus tangled his fingers into Alec's black hair pulling him closer.

_That was the best idea I have ever had._ Magnus thought to himself. It was incredible what a change it made, when Alec wasn't around familiar territory. He was so much at ease and carefree that Magnus sometimes doubted it was actually the Alec he had fallen in love with. Whenever Magnus predicted how Alec would act it turned out be the exactly other way around. But at other times, Alec was still uncomfortable or blushed and Magnus knew he hadn't brought the wrong Alec with him. Not that he wasn't happy about the change in his mood, moreover, he was enthusiastic about Alec's attitude, yet, he was still mesmerized about shy Alec because it is on of the most adorable feature about him. Strong, brave Shadowhunter but shy and self-conscious sometimes.

When they broke apart for oxygen Magnus's mouth curled up in a huge smile in which all his happiness laid. A bit puzzled, Alec looked at him.

"What's the matter with you?"

"I'm just happy to be with you."

Alec smiled, blushing. _How I love that blush_

"And I'm very glad we could make this trip. It's good for us." Magnus went on.

"What do you mean?"

Softly stroking a black strand out of Alec's eyes Magnus explained.

"I don't know if you realize that but you are very carefree since we left New York. Like you don't have to watch out who might see us or what you can allow yourself to do in pubic.

I remember when you come over to see me secretly or when we went out for a date you always tensed up when the situation began to get unsafe, like when I wanted to hold your hand in the restaurant or when the bell rang in my apartment. You were in that inner conflict where you wanted to be comfortable but couldn't bring yourself to be because... well, because of reasons. However, now that you came out and went with me on this trip you're not watching out anymore but enjoy every single moment. I believe you feel some kind of... light now."

Surprised, Alec sat himself back in a sitting position on Magnus who propped himself up on his elbows keeping the eye contact. He recognized Alec's pupils moving, obviously trying to read Magnus's expression and his parted lips were a sure sign that he didn't exactly know what to think of what he just heard. Nervously, his fingers tucked on the warlock's colorful tank top, fumbling with the soft fabric while Magnus watched him thoughtfully.

"I'm...," Alec started, blinked, and moved his eyes to Magnus's throat instead. "It's just...," _Damn, he's cute when stuttering_ "It's you," he finally answered but when Magnus's eyebrows shot up in puzzlement the Shadowhunter clarified his statement.

"I mean, It's true. I feel much more comfortable than ever. But it's you who gave me the opportunity to feel this comfort, you know? You didn't gave up on me when I pulled my hand back to avoid your's or when I jumped alarmed at every strange sound. I knew I acted selfish but I was just... afraid."

Slowly, Magnus sat up, too, careful not to push Alec off his lap and they were on one level when Alec continued his little, sweet speech.

"But when you said you loved me back in Alicante when we slaughtered demons together" Magnus winced a bit at that phrase, Alec surely needed to practice saying more romantic things. "I just wanted to hold your hand and be with you while everyone knows and I didn't want to be uncomfortable anymore. You change me, Magnus. And I'm grateful for that."

Magnus could see that Alec had a lot more to say right now but he couldn't hold back any longer. Leaning forward, he tenderly touched the man's lips with his own, silencing him. A surprised gasp escaped from Alec before he slung his arms around his boyfriend's shoulders to close the little space between them.

"You make me feel so light, Magnus, and I love you for it."

Magnus lustfully moaned in response.

"Aleeec..." Magnus said slowly while running his hand through his hair, spiking up strand after strand in front of the mirror in their bedroom observing his own reflection with narrowed eyes.

"Hm?" came from the other end of the room, where Alec searched through the shopping bags for their ties they had agreed on earlier.

"You need to stop tugging on my hair so hard. I mean, it's hot and I really appreciate it but it's totally ruining my spike crown."

"What?" Alec's head shot up to glance at his boyfriend, his shout a bit louder than intended. Magnus loved how he could catch Alec off guard with such exclamations. Inwardly, Magnus put "Getting him used to sex talk" on his To Do List, out loud he said "My hair, Alec! We're going to opera and my hair looks like a bird family lives in there."

"Then wash it and keep it down," Alec lamely tried to end the -for him- awkward situation.

"No."

"Then stop complaining."

"No."

"Then tell me what I shall do to please you, your highness." the Shadowhunter responded, sarcasm coloring his voice, and paced over to stand behind Magnus after finally having found the ties.

"Oh, you did please me a lot. I am just saying that you could watch out for my hair while doing it." he was expertly teasing his boyfriend and could see in the mirror the cute reaction to it. Not a blush, but a very stubborn expression that won't allow him to lose this thing.

"So, you tell me not to touch your hair."

"That's not exactly what I'm trying to say."

"So, I shall touch your hair without disturbing it."

"Now, you've got it, sugarcube." turning around happily, Magnus took the tie from Alec's hand and began to adjust it around his boyfriend's neck.

"Sorry, but with your head in the pillows it will be ruined even without me touching it."

Magnus's eyes widened in a smirk "Touché." _Maybe this point on my list will be easier to finish than I thought._

"By the way," Alec smiled "I think your hair looks just fine."

"You're too cute," and he sealed it with a soft kiss.

Both in an elegant black suit, Magnus appearance completed with white gloves and a white scarf instead of the red feather boa and red leather boots, they sat in a taxi on their way to Wiener Staatsoper. Frowning, Alec plucked a bit on his collar. Magnus could see that Alec was definitely not used to being dresses up so well. Usually, when dressed up in black and going out late, it meant he was going to hunt demons and be covered in dirt and blood in the end of it. But tonight was no hunting night. Tonight was for the both of them watching a fine Mozart opera.

"You look fantastic, Alec." Magnus purred, grabbing the hand on Alec's collar to place them entangled on the sitting spot between them.

A light blush painted the Shadowhunter's face when he turned to look his boyfriend in the eyes, smiling. "It's just that I'm very excited about tonight. I've never been to an opera and Staatsoper is known to be a very pompous and beautiful building. It's so great that we got tickets."

"Baby, with me you get tickets to everywhere you want to go." Magnus answered and leaned over to get a kiss and his wish was granted. It was a short and sweet kiss, only a brush of lips, but they were in public and Magnus would have never thought to be even able to hold hands outside his apartment in Brooklyn. _The Lightness suits him so well._

"Don't call me that." Alec's voice was low, no need to shout at each other when they were only inches apart.

"What? Baby? What would you prefer? Honeydew? Stardazzle? Pinkie Pie?"

"Magnus." Alec whispered playfully, but warningly

"Oh, darling as much as I would love to call you "great" and "magnificent" and "fabulous" in one word but it could get kinda weird when we both shout that name in pleasure."

The following punch on the shoulder made Magnus giggle.

"I love you," he stated.

Alec opened his mouth but before he could say anything a sizzling light suddenly appeared between them, in the middle of the small flames a beige paper. A fire message.

Bewildered, Alec took it.

"I knew it must have been luck that the Clave didn't interrupt us earlier." Magnus grumbled, his mouth turning into a pout like a child who needed to go to bed without being able to end the game it was playing. "What does they want from you? Did someone steal the Mortal Cup? Or did someone pee into Lake Lyn?" _There'll be punishment if it doesn't have a good reason."_

"Not funny, Magnus." Alec said and handed the paper over "It's addressed to you."

An eyebrow shot up while Magnus took the paper from Alec's hand and read the words "Warlock Bane" in flawless letters. "Could have been from you," he teased but sensed that Alec was in no mood for joking anymore.

"It looks like my mother's handwriting. What does she want?" he asks hastily, a frown forming on his forehead.

Sighing deeply, Magnus unfolded the paper and began to read.

He sighed again when he was done, Alec's eyes studying his expression, asking silently what the letter said.

"We need to go back."

Alec caught the letter from Magnus's hand and read it quickly, teeth gnawing on his upper lip.

"That doesn't even say why." he exclaimed angrily.

"I know. But it's written in the Clave's name. You know what that means."

"Yeah..." Alec leaned back, sighing and his eyes were half closed, corner's of his mouth hanging low.

_He looks so sad._

"Hey." Magnus began cheerfully "Maybe they just need a good translator for some crazy demon language or something. I'm sure it's no serious stuff." lovingly, he ran his thumb over Alec's pale cheekbone. "Don't look so depressed. We can come back as soon as I fulfilled my duty. You've got still leave days and we catch up on going to opera later, okay?"

Weakly, Alec turned to smile at the warlock. "I know. I just really didn't want to get interrupted."

The taxi came to a halt and Magnus paid the driver giving him a generous tip. They left the car, cold air hitting them. Magnus came over to Alec, putting his gloved hand into Alec's bare one. "There is a portal nearby."

The Shadowhunter looked up to his boyfriend and sighed a deep sigh of annoyance. His eyes were dark, as if the lightness of their trip had vanished in an instant and Magnus felt the urge to screw the Clave and just do what he wants to do. And that was everything else that didn't include the Clave. Unfortunately, messing with the Clave was a pretty stupid idea, he learned that, and Alec was very strict when it came to duties, whoever had to do them. Even when it sucked doing them.

"Uhumm." was the murmuring response as they started their way to Wiener Staatsoper, unfortunately not being able to visit it any time soon.


	4. 04 Dark

Finally, the sun started to set.

Alec, Izzy and Jace were sitting in the library discussing the happenings in the last few weeks including Valentines's return, the state of Clary's mother who seems to be Jace's mother as well and other important topics to which Alec didn't pay any attention. Not at all.

While his siblings had a heated conversation, he was more busy with focusing the clock as if he could force it with his bare will to go faster. Yet, it seemed to Alec that, just to annoy him, the time passed even slower than usual.

But just moments ago, when Jace said something about resemblance or something, Alec realized the golden light outside, flooding over the thousand of books, announcing it was going to be night soon.

"What do you think?" Jace asked but his brother's thoughts were at some other place. The golden sun outside reminded him of some cat eyes, glowing mysteriously, and not, to his very own surprise of the ones of his parabatai.

Alec's eyes widened in realization. This was another proof for the new feeling sprouting in him, similar to what he felt for Jace but at the same time so fundamentally different that it confused Alec to the bones. And deeper.

"Hello, earth to Alec." came Jace's voice, snapping the Shadowhunter back to reality.

"What?" Alec blurted, the most unintelligent sound he might have ever made in his entire life making both of his younger siblings laugh.

"I asked for your opinion and then you looked as surprised as Izzy when her food tastes good." Jace teased, giving Alec a pointed look. They stared each other in the eyes for a few seconds, while Isabelle complained, though, she was completely ignored by the boys. Alec was fascinated by the flawless gold in Jace's eyes, a color that he never saw before and was sure never to see in some other person. But something had changed. Yes, his eyes were beautiful but Alec caught himself thinking it's not the most beautiful color he had ever seen anymore. He had found something even more gorgeous, something he could look at all day without getting bored, something that looked at him with the same curiosity Alec assumed casted his face when staring. Had he?

"Eh..." he still had nothing intelligent to say. "Well..."

Now, Isabelle raised an eyebrow. "Are you alright?" she asked bemused.

Alec took a breath to answer but suddenly hesitated. This is perfect, he thought. While he was staring the clock down earlier, his mind was also racing around the question how to excuse himself and get out of the Institute tonight. He couldn't say he was tired from training, because there was no training today and he had used that excuse three days ago already. Pretending a cold again was no option either for he had used that a whole week and it'd be to obvious saying that again. Additionally, he hadn't sneezed all day. Though, right now, to Jace and Izzy he seemed to be tired or confused or weirded out. Maybe even all three of it. So it wouldn't be too odd to go to bed early. As soon as it was completely dark outside he could eat something and go to bed. Nothing unusual.

"Well, I, eh, actually feel a bit . . . dizzy, you know?" he lied and could see in his siblings expressions, both narrowing his eyes at him, that he didn't sound very convincing "It's just not my day," he lamely finished. Lying was nothing he was used to nor good at. And it felt wrong doing it for selfish reasons. Wait, was it selfish not to hurt is family? Would it be even hurtful what he's doing? Jace does it all the time, doesn't he?

"I see." his sister suddenly said "you should go to bed early." There was something in her voice that made Alec feel uncomfortable. Somehow caught.

"Whatever you two are talking about," Jace said standing up from the brown armchair "I'm off." he turned on his heels and headed to the huge wooden door.

"Where're you going?" Alec wanted to know.

"Some secret place where everyone worships the awesome me." he answered and left the room, leaving Alec puzzled and Izzy annoyed behind. Then, she just shrugged, rolled her eyes and put her attention back to her brother.

"So, you're seeing Magnus tonight, huh?" she purred with a wink, her lips forming a mischievous smirk.

Alec stared at her in shock, his face flushing. Avoiding her eyes, he looked out of the window where the sun kissed the skyscrapers goodnight, making room for the moon and stars, and most importantly, for darkness.

"Yeah," he admitted murmuring.

"Maybe we should practice lying." she proposed.

"What?" Alec turned his head to give his sister an incredulous glance. As if one could simply practice that.

"You need to work at your excuses, Alec. You couldn't be more obvious." Alec's face turned redder, his features tensing. Could he possibly feel more uncomfortable? Getting tips for secretly dating from his sister?

"Or even better." she insisted "Tell him."

"Oh, no!" Alec exclaimed, standing up from his place "You know I can't."

Rolling her smoky eyes again, she stood up, too, and put her arms akimbo. "Of course you can, Alec. He'll understand."

"I gotta go, now," this was definitely no topic he wanted to talk about. It had been hard enough for him to tell his sister in the first place so he didn't need any advice from her. He knew what to do. Or so, he thought.

"That won't work forever."

"This conversation is over." without turning around he left the room, hearing Isabelle sigh. Purposely loud, he assumed.

There was no way telling his family, particularly Jace. He knew his family, and he knew they wouldn't approve when Alec suddenly came home holding hands with a glittering, crazy warlock and telling them "Hey, you know Magnus Bane, High Warlock of Brooklyn, right? Yeah, I'm seeing him for a while now. You see, I'm gay. That's all."

Weakly, Alec laughed lightly at the thought. That would never happen. Never.

He arrived at his room. As soon as he closed the door behind him and switched the light on (a good sign, that meant it was getting darker outside) he stripped down his clothes and went into his bathroom. Before seeing Magnus, he wanted to shower because he had said he liked the smell of his fresh washed hair. Sandalwood. Again, Alec was surprised by his own thoughts. He wanted Magnus to like him. A lot.

Hot water was running down his body and Alec let his shoulders relax. Relaxing was something he couldn't allow himself too often, as a Shadowhunter one always needed to be careful and pay attention to everything. And then there was his own personal activity for a while. Now, Alec had to be careful what to say and pay attention to every strange sound he heard when sneaking out of the Institute, too. He mustn't be caught. It be the worst case he could imagine.

However, as soon as the doors close behind him in Magnus's Brooklyn loft, everything seemed to be so much easier. There is Magnus who welcomes Alec with a warm hug and Alec can melt into the strong arms holding him, feeling accepted for who he is. Having met Magnus was the best thing that happened to Alec for a long time. Really.

Clean and smelling like sandalwood, Alec dressed himself in a dark jeans and a black sweater, a small whole at the right sleeve. The sun had vanished completely, a crescent moon replacing it. Shades of clouds were painted over the night sky.

It was finally dark outside.

A smile found its way on Alec's lips, pleasant anticipation tickling down his spine. He couldn't wait anymore, he wanted to be out of this building as fast as possible and meet with Magnus. Alec took his stele and marked himself with a Glamour Rune, making him invisible for mundanes. Inspite of the dark hiding him, he felt much more comfortable when ordinary people won't be able to see him. The less people able to recognize him, the better.

Carefully, he opened the door and stepped into the long corridor, lightened by witchlight. On his way to the stairs (the elevator makes too much noise for sneaking out) he looked into every open room he came by. In one sat Isabelle, doing something Alec couldn't see, and when she realized he was looking worriedly at her, she just winked at him and formed the word "Go" silently with her lips, encouraging him. Alec understood. If someone would ask, she would give him an alibi. So he didn't need to have supper and walk into his parants trying to lie again. As Izzy had observed earlier, he was a terrible lier and he definitely didn't want to arouse any more suspicion. If his parents would ask where he is, Isabelle would handle this for him. Smiling softly at her as a thanks, he headed outside in the darkness. At last.

The subway was surprisingly full, rattling it's way through the stations, people leaving or getting on the train. Alec had a place near the door, looking over the head of an old man reading a thick novel out of the window, staring at the rushing black. He knew the way by heart, knew at which station he had to change trains, knew his way to Magnus's flat in Brooklyn. Now, he was sitting in the last train and had just send a text to the warlock that he was on his way.

"Can't wait, sugarcube ;-)" was the flirty response that made Alec flush.

Not used to such endearings, he shifted uncomfortably on his seat sliding his phone shut and pocketing it back in his jeans, glad that no one could see him. Since their first date Magnus had started calling him cute names to which Alec never knew how to respond. The first time he just stared at the warlock in disbelief and protested against the name -honey- his face blushing a deep red while Magnus had begun to laugh and kissed him on the forehead in a way that said "You need to get used to it."

The Shadowhunter sometimes didn't know how to feel or act around Magnus. On the one hand he absolutely didn't like to be called "darling", "sweetheart", "cupcake" or similar things, on the other hand felt it somehow nice to be so endeared. It made him feel liked and Alec wanted this. He wanted Magnus to like him just like he liked Magnus. And that was a huge lot.

If he just not had to wait for the dark. Always the dark had to protect, to cover him when he wanted to be with the person he liked. Wait, he liked Jace, too, and he could see him whenever he wanted. He just spend almost the whole day with him which was great. Yet, when he thought about it, he didn't actually cared about what Jace had to say. Moreover, he hadn't even stared at Jace, as usual. And not just today, since the incident with Abbadon where Magnus had to save his life, Alec started thinking more about the warlock instead of his parabatai.

What was going on with him?

Nothing was ever so complicated before. He had a plan. The plan to go on living, being Jace's parabatai and keep his crush on him but because it's forbidden to be in love with his parabatai it was safe because it was against the law to admit it and therefore, no one would ever find out he was gay. However, his plan was crumbling, falling apart into little pieces. His safe plan.

The train stopped. Alec woke up out of his reverie and realized he had to leave here. After jumping out of the train, he hastily headed to the exit, cold air hitting him nicely.

Telling himself he shouldn't think so much, he put his hands in his jeans pockets and walked down the street. He had always been one of the worried sort, always thinking everything through and stay distant when a situation seemed to become unsafe. And this might be the most unsafe situation he had ever found himself in. How could the most unsafe situation only feel so great?

Solemnly, he inhaled the cold air to cool his mind. There was one thing that made him feel safe.

The dark.

It surrounded him, covering him, helping him do what made him happy. Visiting Magnus.

When it was light outside, when the sun brightened the earth it would be impossible for Alec to just walk around and do want he wanted. When it was dark, no one would see, would care who he was or where he was going.

But to be honest, to be really honest, Alec thought it sucked to always wait for the sun to go down and leave him alone. Usually, he needed to hunt in the darkness, needed to protect his siblings. His time was limited but the time spent with Magnus was so extraordinarily enjoyable that he could stay at his place all day long, he actually could just look at him all day without getting bored. If his time only wasn't so short. If he could just expand his time to meet Magnus whenever he want, whether the sun was shining or the moon was. He wanted everyone to know and at the same time nothing needed to be kept more safe than this. Nothing.

The darkness was his best friend and worst enemy. Keeping him safe but limiting his time. Making him free and imprisoned.

Thoughtfully, he looked up into the night sky. In a city like New York, not a lot of stars visible and the Moon hid behind clouds.

For now, Alec just thanked the dark that it was there for him, supporting him. One day, he'd be able to come without its company and be with Magnus whenever and wherever he wants while everyone knows. Please.

Alec arrived in front of Magnus's flat. A smile sneaked on his face. This is where he wanted to be.

He could just be happy and enjoy the night and he trusted the odds that he won't have to hunt.

Hopefully, the sun would not rise soon.


End file.
